Monday, December 8, 2008


I think we can all agree, there's a big difference between what people say they want and what they can really deal with- especially when it comes to relationships.

As a friend, there's nothing more stressful than catching your BFF's significant other cheating. Even if you can't stand the best bone in said individual's body; no one wants the bad dating karma associated with ending a romantic relationship. AT ALL. But I think it's even worse if you only THINK you saw something inappropriate...

It's like, if you say something and you're wrong, not only have you started unneccessary mess but your credibility is shot to shot to shit. And we're not even touching on the tension/ drama that's guaranteed to pop off the next time you see the significant other because 1) YOU KNOW they're getting back together and 2) no matter how much she swears she won't divulge where she "heard" the info, pillow talk is like chinese water torture out's all coming out.

But on the flipside, if you don't and it turns out to be true.... Hell hath no fury like a friend who thinks their own BFF knew that they were the laughing stock of the city and didn't "care" enough to say something. No sir, you don't want to have THAT conversation either. Because in addition to losing that one friend, any mutual friends will now be giving you the "she's a shady friend who'll let her girl get played out" side-eye behind your back.

I know, I know, you just can't win.

Well if it's any consolation, like myself, 83% responded that even if a friend merely THINKS that she/ he saw your significant other acting up, they want to know. And yes, we understand that your intel may or may not be correct. But bottom line? I know that I'm not gonna say something unless deep in my heart, I really, really think something is wrong. So until proven wrong (as in straight soap opera- she was deceiving me to screw my man type mess) I'll assume the same for my girls (and Geoff). I'd MUCH rather receive a heads-up from a trusted source than be blindsided by the tomfoolery in the streets. And if you just can't bring yourself to do it, DO NOT tell me after the shit hits the fan! I'm warning you now... You will get cussed out and cut off.

And while clearly I don't believe in sticking my head in the sand... Good for the 16% of you that know yourself well enough to just say no. Sometimes a little ignorance greases the wheels of life. If deep down inside you know that you're not unwilling to confront the bs head-on, then no, don't let people come drop it like it's hot on your doorstep. And be upfront! Puh-lease don't go hard like you want the 411 (you know who you are), only to end up miserable and mad at me b/c every time the main squeeze says he's coming home late you wanna send out the bloodhounds. Instead, let us all hope, for your sake, that the sidepiece doesn't get out of pocket and decide to come knocking.

1 comment:

  1. LOL. From personal experience I must say that the "friends" that are too punk to "get involved" really aren't friends. Because if my man sneezes wrong I want to know about it! Life is too short and I don't want a sloppy, dirty, dog in mine. I hope all my sincere friends can appreciate that. I also hope that women can learn how to keep their sources to themselves. I'll take my ATL source to THE GRAVE. Thanks girl...You don't know how you saved my life and sanity. I am FOEVER in your debt.