Friday, December 24, 2010

have a super duper christmas...

Wow, it is December 24th, Christmas Eve. Wow, almost an entire year has passed ALREADY. SMH.

This was definitely a tumultuous year for many- myself included. However, there are endless reasons to be thankful, happy and optimistic. So do me a favor and FIND at least ONE.

*patiently waits for you to figure it out*

And no matter who you're with, where you're at or whether you even believe in this over commercialized holiday season, at some point between now and December 31st, please stop & take a minute to simply breathe.

You deserve it.

Thank you all so much for rockin' with me over the past year. I am so grateful for each and everyone of my readers. Whether you commented on the blog or simply called to say that I was a damn fool, your input matters. I am always happy to entertain.

Have a wonderful Christmas weekend party people!

Wednesday, December 22, 2010

nothing to cheer about...


Wow, did anyone even know that a former NFL cheerleader has been missing for the past week??? Anybody? Anybody? Nobody?

*crickets*

Yeah, me neither. SMDH. Call me paranoid but, it really feels like folks have just been straight disappearing into thin air this past year.

*shudders*

And although her alledgdly abusive ex-boyfriend was the last known person to see her alive (of course), what makes this case super duper messy is that apparently homegirl was no angel herself.

PAUSE.

Uh huh, apparently, Miss Congeniality was seriously in debt to the tune of tens of thousands of dollars. And wait on it... had not one but FOUR restraining orders taken out against her by different people as well- three different dudes and a chick.

BLANK STARE.

Err-um, yeah that's a lot.

So tell you what, I'm just gonna say a little prayer that Debbie returns home safely from wherever or whatever she's caught up in. And hopefully, the new year brings her much ore peace and happiness than 2010.

why is she a 26 year-old senior...

In this week's swept-under-the-rug news, this past Sunday the Ithaca Police Department snatched up 26 year-old Cornell senior, Keri Lynn Blakinger in some local hotel parking lot holding nearly SIX ounces of UNCUT heroin!!

BLANK STARE w/ 3 LOONG BLINKS

Um,what in the over-educated, no commonsense having, delusions of grandeur hell?

Will someone please explain to me why these privileged college students are behaving like they're corner boys from the 80s? I know the economy is in a recession but times ain't NEVER that goddamn tough if you're enrolled in freaking IVY LEAGUE University! Sheeeit.

But not for nothing, what's really, really, really making my nerves bad is homegirl from Cornell's mugshot. Yo. Why does her skin look like a damn biology class experiment gone all the way WRONG??

This chick has mad sores and open blisters all over her face. Uuggh. Makes me wanna grab a Sharpie and play connect the dots on her pockmarked face. And then her hair... JE-SUS.

*makes the sign of the cross*

No exaggeration, there's so much grease I can smell it from here. I know it's finals week but dammit, she couldn't have taken a quick shower before she went to make that drop? No? Too much?

*gags violently*

Ya'll brats better stop playing the reindeer games, turn off that damn Rick Ross and get your asses back to that study group. Dammit.

pop the bubbly...



I am so proud of President Obama for successfully getting the DADT policy repealed!! This is a BIG moment and he deserves all the shine for not backing down to the damn ridiculous conservative interests (FINALLY) and handling it during a lame duck session.

Take that, take that!!!

It's still so crazy to me that over 14,000 military personnel were discharged from service solely as a result of that archaic homophobic ass policy! As if we can afford to be kicking folks out of the military while we're fighting all these senseless wars.

*rolls eyes & sucks the back of teeth*

If you're willing to put your life on the line to protect the citizens of this country and our freedoms here and abroad, you're better than most of us (myself included). So at the very least, we should all respect your right to fall in love with whomever you choose.

The End.

Tuesday, December 21, 2010

arizona is a bad, bad place...

Right... So about Elizabeth Johnson, the chick in Arizona that basically admitted killing her 8-month year old baby, stuffing his lifeless body in a diaper bag & tossing it into a dumpster after she found out on Facebook that her baby daddy was kicking it to another girl???

DEAD FISH EYES

I'm really starting to think that folks should be required to pass some sort of mental stability exam before having access to social networking sites. 'Cause this is officially doing the most right now. Killing your own flesh and blood because you snooped around and found exactly what you were looking for? Lord have mercy, this is some real life, white trash version of that scene from For Colored Girls... SMDH.

Epic. Parental. FAIL.

And not for nothing, I equally fault the child's father for this senseless tragedy. Mmm-hmm... sure do. Because if you know that you're dealing with a psycho chick- why would you put your personal business on freaking Facebook??

And DO NOT even try to tell us that you didn't think she was capable of the crazy. Not for nothing, I took one look at that 'extra calm, eyes-wide-open but nobody's home' mugshot and I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt... this bish is a killer. Just. Like That.

Meanwhile, he done dates, procreated and been in a protracted custody battle with her looneytunes ass? nope. He should've known better.

As far as I'm concerned, he was practically begging for her to snap off and act up.

*makes a sign of the cross*

You know, instead of spending all that time and energy trying to run out the Mexicans, Governor Jan Brewer should focus on keeping the babies safe unstable moms.

2 steps back...



Hmmm, so THIS is what musical gentrification has gotten us. Fantastic. Just fantastic.

*reaches for the stash of little blue pills & bottle of vodka*

Feel free to thank my homie, Miz Cooper for this gem.

Monday, December 20, 2010

gap goal giveaway...

Wow, are there really only 11 days left in 2010? O.M.G. I swear this year has FLOWN by...

Well on a brighter note, it's time for the next Mitzi Moments Holiday Giveaway. Oh and since we're rolling up on Christmas and I know you most of guys are all bailing out from your computer in t-minus 72 hours, I'm going to extend this contest until the very end of the year. That way, you'll have more than ample time to enter AND tell a friend. WOO HOO!!!

SO without further ado, the fourth and final freebie of 2010 is...

ONE FREE PAIR of GAP JEANS

('cause you know I'm completely obsessed with them and want you to be too)

So get on it!


HERE'S HOW YOU CAN WIN:

MANDATORY
Leave A Comment telling me one SPECIFIC goal (NOT A BEHAVIOR or TRAIT) that you plan to achieve in 2011.

• If you're not already, Be/Become a Mitzi Moments Subscriber (you MUST verify your email subscription to qualify).

FOR EXTRA ENTRIES (please leave a separate comment for each)

TWEET I just entered the @MitziMoments Gap Goal Giveaway for a free pair of GAP jeans.

BECOME a Mitzi Moments Member through Google follower OR subscribe to the Mitzi Moments RSS feed here on the site.

FOLLOW @mitzimoments on Twitter (send me a Tweet letting me know you've done so).

BLOG about this giveaway.

JOIN the official Mitzi Miller Author/ Journalist/ Opinionated Personality Facebook Fan Page HERE (leave a comment on the FB page letting me know you've done so).

THIS CONTEST ENDS AT 9:30A.M. on FRIDAY, DECEMBER 31, 2010. THE WINNER WILL BE ANNOUNCED ON MONDAY, JANUARY 3, 20111. It is only open to residents in the continental U.S.

Friday, December 17, 2010

dance, dance, dance...

What can I say, another Friday, another winner!

This week, I'm happy to announce that winner of the Mitzi Moments' Keep It Rocking Holiday Giveaway is...

MOMMY GLOW!!!!


WOO HOO!! Go Mommy, Go Mommy, Glow! (Okay, clearly I'm in a silly ass mood)

Anyhoo, congrats on winning an iTunes gift card my dear! Have so much fun picking out 10 free songs for your iTunes Library. Hopefully, you'll purchase scandalous songs that make you wanna twerk a little something for no good reason... Oh and feel free to name that playlist after me!

Thursday, December 16, 2010

the babies don't want this for you...

Okay can I tell you how excited I am that Nick finally confirmed that Mariah is expecting AND more importantly, that the couple are having twins??

Because not for nothing, if fertility drugs and wilding out on chicken wings were the ONLY reason homegirl is waddling around looking like she has a mini-fridge strapped to her once flat tummy, I was going to be so, so sad for her... and the plastic surgeon that has to try and put it all back to together.

*shrug*

I'm jussayin. That snapback ain't same when you're over 40.

But riddle me this Robin, what in the eyesore HELL is Mariah wearing in this picture?

I promise you, that fugly ass, long-sleeve, school marm dress is cut from some raggedy bedazzled, lace covered, Christmas quilt material made in a sweatshop in China. It has too be. And the placement of the droopy satin bow? Right under what have clearly become her ample size EFZ boobs??

No ma'am Miss Mariah. I cannot.

For this, I'd MUCH rather she be back in her something from her rainbow colored collection itsy bitsy bullshit ass stretch dresses . At least that tomfoolery, I'm already mentally accustomed. Cause this craziness right here, is making my nerves bad. Lord...

*reaches for a handful of the little blue and red pills*

PS. I'm EXTRA mad at Nick for standing there, skinning and grinning while his wife looks like bloody road kill. You're wrong for that Mr. Cannon. DEAD ASS WRONG!!

cloudy days ahead...

Oh Heidi, Heidi, Heidi... I know it's hard to stay relevant in television these days. Especially when you're a visibly aging weather girl for the weekend evening news report show.

(SIDEBAR:. I so didn't even know there was a evening news broadcasts on the weekends! Who's watching the news on a damn Saturday??)

But sweetie, filing false rape reports is not the way to way to do that sunshine.

Personally, I believe you should serve every last day of that year long jail sentence. Perhaps that will give you some time to think about all the ACTUAL rape victims whose REAL cases weren't being investigated while the police went on this wild goose of yours.

DEAD FISH EYES

Oh and good luck with that job suspension... Seems like a shitty economy to be playing the reindeer games with your livelihood. Sure hope your attention-seeking ass saved up for a rainy day.

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

keep a candle lit...

There seems to be a lot going on this morning. From what looks to be another serial killer in Long Island to the shoot out in a Florida school board meeting to Juarez, Mexico reporting it's 3,000th homicide of the year, its a busy news.

Ironically, one story that does not seem to be getting any air time, except from a few conscious bloggers and on my not-so secret political correspondent crush, Marc Lamont Hill's Twitter feed is the non-violent protest (they're refusing to leave their cells to work or eat) Georgia State Prisoners have been staging for the past six days.

Apparently the inmates are refusing to work and eat until they are granted:

- Fair wages for their labor

- Educational Opportunities including vocational and self-improvement opportunities

- Basic Healthcare

-An end to cruel and unusual punishments

-Decent Living Conditions

-Nutritional meals

-Access to families

-Just parole decisions

Um, not ONE of these requests seem unreasonable to me.

Yet, they're being dragged from their cells, beaten, denied hot water or heat and alternatively thrown in solitary confinement to force them to go back to work. Guess they don't give a damn if they don't wanna eat, huh?

Regardless of the crime- who's mad at a con for wanting to pick up a book or a trade? Uh, not me. Lord only knows what kind of sickness and contagious diseases are running rampant inside them dirty ass prisons... If we're not using cruel and unusual punishment on terrorists, why would we utilize it against our own citizens? I mean, just because you're in jail, doesn't mean you have to live like an animal. Why shouldn't they have a decent cell? Or get to see their families. Maybe those visits will be motivation to act right. As for pay, the average prisoner only makes 5o cents an hour. these guys are making NOTHING. Come on, that's ridiculous. Oh and you know what, since all the right-wing parents of little fatass kids are beefing about our First Lady wanting to 'dictate "what's on their school menus- just go on and give the damn apples and bananas to the prisoners.

Word.

So even if there are no breaking news headlines every hour on CNN, by all means, get to praying.

All those men are asking for is a little bit of decency and to be treated like human beings. And if it is not given now, please believe when they are all finally released, most will probably return the favor to their respective communities.

BLANK STARE

** Snatched this from The Crunk Feminist Collective's post on the matter:
Below is a list of prisons where prisoners are still on lockdown & where you can call to express concern.

Hays State Prison—706-857-0400

Macon State Prison—978-472-3900

Telfair State Prison—229-868-7721

Smith State Prison – 912-654-5000

The Georgia Department of Corrections is at http://www.dcor.state.ga.us and their phone number is 478-992-5246

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

when lightskin was big in da hood...



Yesterday afternoon I came across a well written criticism of Kanye's West upcoming video, Monster. (Read it HERE) The writer, Melinda Tankard Reist takes serious issue with all of the dead bodies strewn throughout the promo. And not just because it's kinda distasteful to have corpses literally hanging around from the rafters, but be really because, from the clip it seems that all the bodies are women. And truth be told, there is a certain unavoidable subliminal message conveyed when the only bodies being desecrated and discarded are female. It's called gendered violence.

Now with all that said, I actually respect Kanye's willingness to take everything to the limit- even if it makes folks question whether you have a thing for necrophilia. BLANK STARE.

Shoot, it takes a lot to make a hit song that really sticks with folks nowadays.

So, I'm not jumping to judgement until I see the entire video. And I'll also keep my fingers crossed that there are a bunch of dead male bodies chilling in Nikki Minaj's segment. To make it equal and whatnot...

*shrug*

But morning, I got to reminiscing about the days that it didn't take FOUR people and a graphic ass video to make a song memorable. You know, when ONE dope ass rapper could create a banger that was so hot you didn't even need the video (that was clearly conceptualized ny people under the influence of more than a little licca and probably cost all of $50).

Exhibit A: Redman's 's Time 4 Sum Aksion

Keep it real, if you were older than 8 years old at the time that this song dropped, it was your shit. Forreal. And if you weren't, get into it now.

Oh, by all means, feel free to thank me later.

Monday, December 13, 2010

keep it rockin' giveaway....

More giveaways, more giveaway, more giveaways!!!

So in direct response to what can only be described as a lackluster year for album releases (i.e. SouljaBoy's tragic Soundscan numbers), I'll be doing my part to help the entertainment industry by gifting one Moments member a gift card for 10 Free Songs on iTunes.

And even if you don't give a damn bout that new Diddy-Dirty Money foolishness dropping tomorrow... Who couldn't use some new Jazmine Sullivan on the iPod or MP3 player of choice to help you zone out during these frantic last minute holiday shopping days?

Exactly.

Here's what you need to do to win:

MANDATORY

Leave Me A Comment telling me one bad habit you plan to leave behind in 2010.

• If you're not already, Be/Become a Mitzi Moments Subscriber (you MUST verify your email subscription to qualify).

FOR EXTRA ENTRIES (please leave a separate comment for each)

TWEET I just entered the @MitziMoments Keep It Rockin' Giveaway for a free iTunes gift card. http://tinyurl.com/26vrh7y

BECOME a Mitzi Moments Member through Google follower OR subscribe to the Mitzi Moments RSS feed here on the site.

FOLLOW @mitzimoments on Twitter (send me a Tweet letting me know you've done so).

BLOG about this giveaway.

JOIN the official Mitzi Miller Author/ Journalist/ Opinionated Personality Facebook Fan Page HERE (leave a comment on the FB page letting me know you've done so).


THIS CONTEST ENDS AT 9:30A.M. on FRIDAY, DECEMBER 17, 2010. THE WINNER WILL BE ANNOUNCED ON FRIDAY, DECEMBER 17, 2010. It is only open to residents in the continental U.S.



Friday, December 10, 2010

page-turner winner...

Love, love love Fridays! Especially when I have something good to talk about. So without further ado, the winner of the Mitzi Moments Holiday Page- Turner Giveaway is...

AMANDA S.

Congrats my dear on winning an autographed copy of Raised By The Mistress by Jamilah B. Creekmur.

And it just so happens that as of today, the memoir has sold out for the THIRD time on amazon.com!!!

WOOO HOOO!!!


To claim your prize, at your earliest please forward your mailing addy to: mitzimoments@gmail.com

Thursday, December 9, 2010

take that, take that...



The first time I watched this video of Puff running through the freezing cold streets of New York City promoting his new album like a bootlegger in the barbershop, I didn't understand why he was putting himself through it. The man is like a thousand years old, wearing an old school varsity jacket, talking "take back the streets." From who? How? Man listen. Sean, go sit your behind down somewhere and manage Nikki Minaj. We all know, Last Train to Paris is never going to be chart topper. Might as well, let go, let God and start working on the next season of Making The Band.

BUT THEN, I heard about SouljaBoy's album only selling 13,000 copies TOTAL in the first week out. Woah.

There's an average selling album and then here's a TOTAL BELLY FLOP. SouljaBoy selling less copies than the number of people that live within the 5-block radius my neighborhood is a TOTAL. BELLY. FLOP.

Jesus.

13,000 copies?? A number like that makes you question whether his own family bothered to buy the album. I'm just saying.

*kanye shrug*

And you know what, Diddy I get it. You better be on the sidewalk running down white folks and making them promise to pre-order copies of your album. Matter of fact, if I was you, I go find those shiny suits you and Mase used to rock and get to dancing.

And the magic number is: 13,001.

Let's Go!!!

Wednesday, December 8, 2010

another reason to support hbcus....

Running out the door this morning but I had to take a moment and give a shout out to the 5 brilliant Columbia students that were arrested yesterday afternoon in the wake of a huge undercover narcotics operation: (from left) Stephan Vincenzo, Michael Wymbs, Chris Coles, Adam Klein and Harrison David .

Way to use your intelligence, access and priviledge for a whole bunch of nothing. Absolutely NOTHING.

Yeah... My fave is Harrison talking about, he HAD to do it because his father wouldn't pay his tuition. Word? And the concept of a student loan and part-time job never, ever, ever crossed his mind, huh? Oh okay, just checking.

BLANK STARE

All of ya'll are a bunch of freaking idiots. Instead of graduation, now you're looking at serious Fed time. Good. Luck.

PS. Special kudos to the Chris Coles. There's always a confused one in the bunch. Your poor parents... this is NOT what they signed on for when they sent their little Black boy to a such a prestigious Ivy League University.

Tuesday, December 7, 2010

like bam, bam, bam, bam...



So naturally as soon my to-do list becomes longer than Kim Zolciak's ratty hair extensions, I immediately try to find creative ways to procrastinate. And this morning's tomfoolery of choice was purging my iTunes Library. Why? Well because every once in a while, a girl's gotta delete some worthless Lloyd Banks nonsense to make room for some even more triflin' Key$sha crap on her iPod.

Don't judge me.

So anyhoo, in the midst of squandering precious periods of productivity, I came across an oldie-but-goodie that made me truly reflect on the type of music I've been shaking my behind to over the years: The Ying Yang Twins' single, Wait (a.k.a. The Whisper Song).

Yo, was this craziness really a chart topping song? Forreal? Profanity-laced lyrics hoarsely whispered by two men who I wouldn't want to shake hands with let alone "beat the pussy up"? SMH. I Can't.

*swandives into the shallow end of the pool*

Oh and the worst part? As SOON as I pressed play my hips involuntarily started to twerk a lil' something. Sigh. I hate myself.

Lord forgive us for our questionable musical taste. We know not what a dope beat will do. In the name of trashy hip-hop, stripper theme songs & the come-up of ugly men everywhere... Amen.

Monday, December 6, 2010

holiday page-turner giveaway...

And the Holiday Giveaway train continues to roll.

This week, I'm excited to gift one lucky Moments reader with an autographed copy of Raised By The Mistress: My Mother, Her Lover & Me by Jamilah B. Creekmur.

I have to tell you, I've enjoyed reading a lot of great books this year. But this memoir from the perspective of a child who is aware of the fact that her mom was a sidechick BEFORE it become such an acceptable way of life (looks directly at Alicia Keys) is fantastic. Written with New York Times bestselling author, Aliya S. King; Jamilah keeps it all the way real from beginning to end.

Oh and wait on it.... the book even includes chapters written by her mom and Mr. Wayne, the man her mom was intimately involved with for almost 20 years.

BLANK STARE

Trust me, even if you're not a "reader" you'll still get caught up in the drama of this book.

Here's what you've got to do to win your own autographed copy:

MANDATORY

Leave Me A Comment telling me the kindest thing you've done for someone else in 2010.

• If you're not already, Be/Become a Mitzi Moments Subscriber (you MUST verify your email subscription to qualify).

FOR EXTRA ENTRIES (please leave a separate comment for each)

TWEET I just entered the @MitziMoments Holiday Page Turner Giveaway for a free copy of Raised By The Mistress. http://tinyurl.com/2w3eu4m

BECOME a Mitzi Moments Member through Google follower OR subscribe to the Mitzi Moments RSS feed here on the site.

FOLLOW @mitzimoments on Twitter (send me a Tweet letting me know you've done so).

BLOG about this giveaway.

JOIN the official Mitzi Miller Author/ Journalist/ Opinionated Personality Facebook Fan Page HERE (leave a comment on the FB page letting me know you've done so).


THIS CONTEST ENDS AT 9:30A.M. on FRIDAY, DECEMBER 10, 2010. THE WINNER WILL BE ANNOUNCED ON FRIDAY, DECEMBER 10, 2010. It is only open to residents in the continental U.S.

Friday, December 3, 2010

guess who got that body beautiful...

Nothing make a woman feel better than when her hair is looking correct... okay, almost nothing.

*innocent face*

But since I can't really help you with the other things, it's my pleasure to at least help one Moments member get her head right with the Karen's Body Beautiful 'Keep It Soft Survival Kit' full of some of my fave products.

Drumroll please.

And according to random.org, the winner of the MitziMoments' Holiday Body Beautiful Giveaway is...

LISA JONES

Congrats Ms. Jones!!! May the Survival Kit keep your hair bouncing and behaving during the harsh winter months!!

To receive your prize, please email your mailing address to: mitzimoments@gmail.com

Thursday, December 2, 2010

the right place for your nude pic collection...

The internet never ceases to amaze me...

Case in point- I just found out about a social networking site called iVoyuer that's describes itself as 'the premier high-end social networking site for sexy swingers and curious sensualists'.

Uh-huh you read that correctly- curious sensualists.

According to Urban Daddy (the source of all things worth knowing in NYC), iVoyuer is "like Facebook for the Eyes Wide Shut crowd. So instead of reconnecting with your long-lost high school lab partner—though you never know—you’ll arrange for a night of sensual massage with a comely Danish couple in town for the weekend."

Well, alrighty then.

Apparently, "you’ll start out with a questionnaire on the standard stuff—location, body type, safe word ("popcorn")—before connecting to a database of singles and couples. From there, messages and friending work just like Facebook... but with better party pics."

And wait on it... "every few months, the folks behind the site will throw a members-only bash, complete with masks, a secret location and things we can’t even talk about on the Internet."

I can't... But you should certainly feel free.

Check it out HERE.

Wednesday, December 1, 2010

more important than nikki minaj album sales numbers...

Just a quick note to ask everyone to say an extra prayer for all the TWO MILLION people that will be losing their unemployment benefits as of today because our government couldn't put aside their differences and agree on an extension period.

Many of them are educated, responsible citizens with children who have been looking for work in a barren job market since 2009.

It's not a good look. Seriously.

*stares directly at all the conservative Democrats, Republicans and Tea Party congressional members going hard while people go hungry*

happy, healthy & right behind the driver...

And the list of things to be thankful continues...

Today is the 55th Anniversary of Rosa Parks' refusal to move to the back of a segregated bus in Montgomery, Alabama. A courageous decision that became the public fame which ignited the already bubbling civil rights movement.

Thanks to this woman's strength, conviction and ability to see the big picture, generations of people's lives-Black, White and everything in-between- have been changed.

I salute you Ms. Parks.

But err-um, speaking of the big picture... I sure hope that everyone reading this post continues to be vigilant about their personal health and well-being. You know the drill: ask as many questions about your partner(s) about past sexual history as you do about who's posting what on their FB page, use condoms each and every time and get tested for AIDS regularly.

Although its wonderful to know that new medications appear to make living with the illness more manageable, I SURE wouldn't want any of ya'll to have to find out firsthand. Okay?

BLANK STARE w 3 LOOOONG BLINKS