In this week's swept-under-the-rug news, this past Sunday the Ithaca Police Department snatched up 26 year-old Cornell senior, Keri Lynn Blakinger in some local hotel parking lot holding nearly SIX ounces of UNCUT heroin!!
BLANK STARE w/ 3 LOONG BLINKS
Um,what in the over-educated, no commonsense having, delusions of grandeur hell?
Will someone please explain to me why these privileged college students are behaving like they're corner boys from the 80s? I know the economy is in a recession but times ain't NEVER that goddamn tough if you're enrolled in freaking IVY LEAGUE University! Sheeeit.
But not for nothing, what's really, really, really making my nerves bad is homegirl from Cornell's mugshot. Yo. Why does her skin look like a damn biology class experiment gone all the way WRONG??
This chick has mad sores and open blisters all over her face. Uuggh. Makes me wanna grab a Sharpie and play connect the dots on her pockmarked face. And then her hair... JE-SUS.
*makes the sign of the cross*
No exaggeration, there's so much grease I can smell it from here. I know it's finals week but dammit, she couldn't have taken a quick shower before she went to make that drop? No? Too much?
Ya'll brats better stop playing the reindeer games, turn off that damn Rick Ross and get your asses back to that study group. Dammit.