Friday, February 6, 2009

thank you tinita...

So lemme tell you what had happened...

In true impulsive Mitzi fashion, in the middle of the night, I up and ordered a brown file cabinet from Staples. I mean it wasn't really, really all that impulsive since I've allegedly been redecorating since October. However, I describe it as impulsive because genius that I am, I didn't bother to check the measurements. I was just so relieved to 1) find a brown file cabinet (who knew how hard that color was to locate?) and 2) find it while Staples had a free next day shipping promotion going on, that I figured what the hell? I mean how big could one 2-drawer file cabinet be, right? Right.

Needless to say, the file cabinet arrives a day later and this mo-fu is huge. Huge like it takes up a complete third of my living room. And to make matters worse, its heavy as I don't know what. There's absolutely no way in hell I can just pick it up and take it back to Staples myself. At least not without giving myself a freaking hernia. So you know I'm super stressed out...

In this moment it dawns on me what the absolute worst part of being single is... No, it's not the long nights the week before your period, the lack of companionship during all those annoying couple events or even the crazy dating games we all too often find ourselves caught up in. Yo, forreal, forreal, its the maintenance. Straight up. It's the not having someone to put shit make back together when the little things make me wanna fall apart. From figuring out how to change a lightbulb in the vaulted ceiling to taking out the freaking trash to changing a flat tire on the side of the highway in the middle of the night and yes, getting this big ole stupid bix outta my damn house- I really miss the extra set of capable hands.

I'm telling you, when I finally land a boy worth mentioning, I'm always going to loan him out to all of my friends like books from the library. No questions asked. Cause that there feeling of helplessness is for the birds.


  1. Girl, one of my dear friends is a married man. I have known him since college and he doesn't mind doing work. I call him my "married husband".

    We have figured out a barter system. I cook, he does work around the house. His wife doesn't cook too tough, so its a wonderful arrangement. He'll call and be like "what you cooking tonight ? We coming over!"...BET .. and after dinner I have a list of things for him to do.. works wonders. I can't stand this new breed of dudes who I date. They always tell me "I mean, I will pay for it...just send me the invoice"...not acceptable for a southern woman.

  2. With a brother that resourceful you gotta be careful, they may not want to let him go!