Tuesday, December 1, 2009

somebody doesn't watch CSI...

Hmmm, I'm torn.

When I first turned on the computer and saw the breaking AP report about the guy in Washington State that murdered 4 police officers being shot to death, I figured I'd write about this recent trend of African-American serial killers and crazies. 'Cause lord knows ever since the DC Snipers set it off, the folks been actin' all out of pocket. Doin' stuff we had pretty much left the pinktoes, i.e leaving half buried women around your house, going on unprovoked killing sprees, etc. *Dead Fish Eyes*

THEN, I read the story about Casey Johnson, the "troubled" 30 year-old lesbian heiress to the Johnson & Johnson fortune and daughter of the owner of The NY Jets. And I promise you, this story made me straight laugh out loud! WHY in the world would a woman who stands to inherit BILLIONS of dollars rob anyone? Least of all, a friend? Sigh. The only thing I can come up with is too much time on her hands... 'Cause it seems Ms. Baby Lotion herself ganked "dozens of pieces of clothing, jewelry and some documents" from Jasmine Lennard, an alleged supermodel (although I ain't never ever, ever hear of this chick before).

Oh and here's the funny 'ish- the socialite got caught 'cause her bottom bee-yatch ratted her out (mind you this is the same shady jump-off that apparently beat that ass and set #1 Jets fan's hair on fire earlier in the year).

Anyhoo, Casey showed up at the on-again, off-again girlfriend's crib acting CA-razy! So the chick freaked out ('cause who the hell wouldn't) and sent Jasmine a text message talkin' about: 'There's a problem Jaz, Casey Johnson just got into bed with me and she is wearing your underwear. You need to call the police. There are documents here, your shoes and your clothing-- you need to call the police." Wearing another woman's panties? Tragic.

But wait on it... Casey was so gangsta with it, she left said supermodel a used vibrator in her bed and a wet towel on the floor.

And I'm DONE. Feel free to order the Walmart casket IMMEDIATELY.


  1. How did Casey know they were Jasmine's panties?

  2. RIGHT!!! How did she know!!! Okay and what is up with the vibrator and wet towel!!!! I am with you TOO MUCH free time!!!! Repeat TOO MUCH Free time!!!!

  3. Again Mitzi you have managed to make me feel better about life! Wow!