Friday, May 30, 2008

shameless self promotion...


I wrote the Usher cover story. And it is my very first VIBE cover EVER.

So I don't care how over Ursher and his self created baby mama drama you are, act like you know and pick it up.

I want to hear what you think...

PS, that is so NOT the coverline that I would have given this story.

yes we were taking pics in the theater...

So me and the crew went to see the very first showing of The Sex In The City movie last night at 12.01am and I have to say, its was super cute.
I was never really a huge fan of the show (gasp, yes it's true). Nevertheless, I decided to join in the bonding moment and trek down to Chelsea Cinemas to see the fabled production. Let's just say, we knew the night was off to a great start when the semi-illiterate usher came to belatedly inform us that we everyone with 12.01am tix could bypass the ridiculous line and go straight into the theaters causing a stampede of Chelsea boys literally running over little girls in high heels. A classic NYC memory for life.
About the movie: if you're not in love or a total romantic, the most important thing was the wardrobe. Happily, Carrie's uber creative wardrobe choices (my fave by far being the grandmas drawers she sported in the bed with BIG) did not disappoint and lusted for Miranda's plethora of coats and leather gloves (I'm such a winter gear woman).
I highly recommend that every woman go with at least three girlfriends who talk during the movies to enjoy the experience fully.

Wednesday, May 28, 2008

i got my back twisted out...

And my whole body aligned this afternoon by an adorable chiropractor who promises to significantly reduce this throbbing sensation in my right arm in six sessions. Sounds optimistic to me but what the hell do I have to lose? I must say; at this point I'd be willing to barter my first born for a little relief. Like seriously.

So the thrilling news of the day? I finally finished the last chapter in the third installment of my Hotlanta series!!! WOO HOO! Let the editing commence! If all goes well, I might actually be able to put this puppy to bed within the next couple of weeks. On the flip side, I'm actually kind of sad cause it really has been a lot of fun thinking teenage angst versus focusing on my own very adult problems. Like um, the freakin' astronomical price of gas!

When I say that I'm about to go buy a bike with matching helmet, I'm so serious with it. The Volvo drives like a dream but ain't nothing but a gas guzzler. And I simply cannot pay $50 to fill 3/4s of a tank. That's just silly. Not to date myself but I remember when I thought 99 cents a gallon was a lot. Sigh. I'm like the old lady at the bar talking about the good 'ole days... just sad.

Tuesday, May 27, 2008

black don't crack...

While it may have felt like I spent my entire holiday weekend in front of a laptop working, in reality, I did take two days to drive upstate to Kingston, NY for my girl Joan's 43rd birthday party. This year's grand event was a bikini BBQ followed by cupcake & champagne sleepover. Excluding myself, there were six fantastic women and one yummy boy to help bring in Ms. Morgan's new year. We all sat around, talked a whole bunch of nonsense, cracked terrible jokes, ate/drank until we were stuffed and then passed out. Um, can we say so much fun? If I didn't enjoy all the perks of being a Scorpio so much, I swear I'd hate on everyone with a summertime birthday.
How did you kick off the summer of 2008?

Thursday, May 22, 2008

jesus be a spicy salmon roll...

Praise the Lord, I just found a decent, clean Japanese restaurant that delivers to my apartment!!! I'm so happy I can hear angels singing... or wait maybe that's my neighbor Gladysis.
Either way, I'm feeling happy enough to overlook the tragedy that is Usher getting a seperation from Tameka after nine months. Can you say iron clad prenup? And bigger than that, the rumor that Kobe Bryant got caught cheating AGAIN. This time it was with a Lakers cheerleader named Vanessa (knda ironic, huh?). Good grief, does he never learn?
Now I kinda realize why people were so annoyed with Jay-Z and Beyonce for not letting us see the wedding. At least the majority of us believe that they have a union that's going to last longer than the next album release or championship season... so disheartening, no?
And just curious, when the hell is it going to get warm in NYC? Err-um, I don't care if the ice cream trucks are blocking traffic on these tiny one-way streets, mid-70s is NOT summer weather!!

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

I'm still crying...

When I grow up, I want to have a home in Sedona, AZ. It was one of the most breathtaking, peaceful, inspiring places I've been to in the United Staes. The blue skies, red rocks, wide open spaces, hot weather and happy zen people were exactly what the therapist ordered.
Over the course of three days, I managed to got to a baseball game, bronze by the pool, be very prolific (I wrote 3 whole chapters!!), hike up a mountain, eat fantastic food, hang out at a water park and get some much needed rest. I also met an amazing friend of a friend who doesn't know it yet but is about to really regret his offer to let me come through anytime I want. ;)
Unfortunately, I don't have anything to show for it because I mistakenly left my camera on the plane when I landed at LaGuardia on Monday night. And needless to say, nobody turned it in to the lost & found.. Sigh. There are no honest people in the world, I am so sad there are no words.

Saturday, May 17, 2008

it was so big...

It took almost seven hours but I finally made it to Phoenix, Arizona. I'm so excited to be somewhere that 90 degrees and straight sunshine in considered a cool day; I don't know what to do with myself. Oh wait, yes I do, I went and worked poolside.
When the sun finally went down, I headed over to Chase Stadium to check out the Arizona Diamond Backs play the Detroit Tigers (wearing my Yankees cap of course). Can I just tell you? I had the biggest case of stadium envy! It was so modern and clean compared to Yankee Stadium; I almost didn't know to act. The fans were all orderly and polite (read: uninteresting). There were fireworks whenever a player hit a homerun. and even when they (unfortunately) rallied in the 7th to beat the Tiger 4-3, there was very little gloating or tomfoolery.

Got to be honest, not sure I like that.

I sure hope that when the new Yankee Stadium opens up next season, people don't start to act so civilized that I can't catch a mom losing her mind over a lame play while feeding her 7 year old kid a hotdog. Yeah, I said it.

Wednesday, May 14, 2008

they really like it...

This morning I had my first official book signing/ reading for HOTLANTA. Denene flew up from Atlanta and we spoke to about thrity high school students from two different schools in Brooklyn at the Brooklyn Public Library in Grand Army Plaza (the ones in the picture are from a private school and the rest were from a local public school).
Omigod, it was so fun!! I love me some opinated teenagers! Those kids are hilarious and the things that make them happy are so silly. It was really nice to hear feedback about the story- which characters they liked, hated, didn't understand...But most of all, it gave me the motivation to keep writing. Because as many of you know, I have been having the harest time concentrating on this thrid installment of the series. Sigh. Maybe this writing for a living thing ain't all bad...

Monday, May 12, 2008

the people you really need to know...

Praise the Lord, I have finally made friends with the girl who works at the Dunkin Doughnuts across the street from my house!!! WOO HOO!! When I say I feel like I won the fraking lotto, I kid you not.
You see, for the self employed, the DD girl is the equivilant to the ladies in the cafe at a corporate office. When they like you, all sorts of good things happen. At JANE, I used to get free juice and extra fries. Not to mention, the occasional bag of gummy bears. Now, I'm receiveing a friendly smile and a free chocolate frosted with sprinkles. YUMMY!!!
Sure this friendship is the undoing of all the hours that I spend running to my death on the threadmill but who doesn't like free?

Friday, May 9, 2008

my cell phone gives me high blood pressure...

It's certified, I have the absolutely worst PDA luck in the world. After less than a month, the $300 phone that I finally upgraded to b/c everyone insisted it would make my life less stressful started to act up- the light would go out in the middle of typing an email, the icons freeze, the oh-so-addictive game was on the blink and the ringers didn't work. Go figure.
So like any savy consumer who paid way too much for a product, I immediately take the phone back to the store where I bought. Sounds simple, right? Wrong. Customer service in the Sprint store on 34th street is a nighmare of incompetency. I lost FOUR hours of my life trying to get a new phone despite the fact that there I was only one of three customers in the store. But wait on it, I get home and realize the internet service is jacked up!!!

Now everytime I send a message from my handset, a copy of it gets delivered to my inbox (almost as if I'd cc'd myself on the message). AND, when I send an email from my computer at home (because Gmail is the primary email account on the phone), I get a message from there on the handset as well. It's ridiculous. I spent THREE hours on the phone with the Blackberry customer rep for her to come to the conclussion that there's a malfunction with the handset and I need to GO BACK to Sprint and get another phone.

I almost vomited in my mouth. Reduce stress? This damn phone has me on the verge of a breakdown. I want to pitch it across the room or even better at the half way illiterate chick who sold it to me. Oh my goodness, I completley and totally understand Naomi right now...

Does anybody have a Blackberry where their Gmail account its the default account? And if so, CAN YOU PLEASE HELP ME????? I sewar, if I have to go back to that Sprint store on a Saturday, I very well might commit suicide.

Thursday, May 8, 2008

will you sing with the choir...

Is it just me or are Black men between 30 to 38 years old, looking grossly out of shape nowadays? Like seriously, can a sister get some washboard abs and tight pecs in her life without dating a professional athlete? Or recent parolee?
Now don't get me wrong, as my close friends will quickly attest, over the years I have been known to find all kinds of men attractive- tall, short, slim, even juicy... BUT there's a limitation to the stupidity. And when the extra smedium button-up shirt is straining against the double D man-boobs and those birthing hips are so pronounced that the most expensive suit in the world can't hide the swaying movement, it's a wrap. And you know what I'm talking about dammit!!
Say it with me now...

Wednesday, May 7, 2008

my hair hates me...

Sigh, I'm having a really bad hair moment. My 'fro is fighting me at every step and I'm really starting to think that that this whole natural hair thing is for the birds. Yeah, I siad it- it might be time to slap a good old fashioned perm up in this nappy head of mine.
I am sick and tired of losing an hour and a half of my life combing this hot ass mess out. Not to mention what it does to my carpal tunnel. I get out of the shower feeling like a cripple. It's crazy.
And let's not talk about all these new gray hairs are popping up. I really don't want to dye my hair but if I see one more gray hair, I'm going to scream. My mom rationalized the newest patch that just sprouted up in the front of my head by saying that I'm 32 and that's what happens when you get old. Geez, thanks Elsa.
Honestly, I think I need a good haircut but my lazy ass likes to pull my hair up in a ponytail. Can't do the pony puff without the length. Besides, I'm afraid that if I go into the salon feeling funky and undecisive, I might come out with no hair at all.
Perhaps I need suggestions. What color do you think I should dye my hair? Should I perm it? Maybe I should just wear a dramatic Beyonce-esque weave for a little while until I decide what I want to do... holler at the kid.